That interlude though.
IM MAD AS FUCK. IM PISSED. I FUCKING HATE THIS PERSON. LETS NAME HIM…… JOHN. AND I FUCKING HATE JOHN.
I am so angry. So upset. So sad. SO tired.
Tired of hating you. Tired of loving you. Tired of crying for you.
I let a person who treated me like shit last in my life for about 6 months. What a mistake. What a tragedy. What a disappointment to us all.
You live. You learn. I learned never to ever sacrifice my life or well being for the sake of another person. I have done it too many times. I have to find myself and love myself. Always.
Fuck being heartbroken. Fuck living to please another person. PLEASE YOUR FUCKING SELF. IF A PERSON IN YOUR LIFE HAS A PROBLEM WITH HOW YOU PLEASE YOURSELF THEN PLEASE…. EXCUSE YOURSELF FROM THAT SITUATION. THATS RED FLAG NUMBER ONE!!
How predictable was this demise? How predictable was this stupid affair we had? This thing we thought was a real relationship. It wasn’t. It was all a big fucking crutch. For both of us. But I was the crutch usually. And I’m worn down now. I can’t seem to do it anymore. You’ve caused so much damaged. You were like a hurricane coming into my life and destroying everything, the good and bad. I went through hell these past months. All the while trying to make you happy. This is the truth. People want the truth? No they don’t. They just want something that sounds pretty and is almost relatable. This is the truth. I am a heartbroken amazing individual who can change your life for the better always. If you take advantage of that, you will lose me. And you will never find happiness with me. Because you simply don’t deserve it. I am sad that you can’t experience the wonderment and freedom of the life I have to offer. I’m sad you can’t experience how whole I can make you feel.
Fuck everything right now. Just fuck it.
Hello, I am broken
This thing called love happened to me
I’m not sure when.
I’ve been through shit this year
I’ll never forget
But You I hope I do
I hope I can.
Darkness has been my favorite spot
For some months now
After the smiles that we had
It rained a good long while
The shower still persists sometimes
when I get to that place
But I know one day the clouds will move
and I’ll shine again
Thank you God for my struggles
I would never know my blessings without them